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Rudy the Local Brewer

To the theme of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer

“Anybody need a f$%kin’ omelette?”

Rudy the local brewer
had a very shiny whisk.
And if you ever saw it
you’d wanna hold it in your fist.

All of the other brewers
laughed because it wasn’t wood.
They always told poor Rudy
his mash paddle just was no good.

Then one foggy Christmas Eve
Santa came to say:
“Rudy, with my mash so thick,
won’t you stir it nice and quick?”

Then all the brewers loved him,
and they shouted out with glee,
“Rudy the local brewer,
you’ll go down in history!”

I could have told you that our collaboration with Roc Brewing, Nano Nano, is available this week. I could have said a bunch of other stuff. But it’s the holiday season, damn it, and I haven’t subjected you all to bad poetry in a while.

I do, however, recognize that this doesn’t hold a candle to the best Christmas song, “It’s beginning to look a lot like fishmen.”